Today, you are a member of… Gargantua and of Pantagruel

When faced with an overload of pat tripe, supreme idiocy, and dangerously inane demands, there are several ways you can respond, Members. Just to name a few, there is “Mercy,” “Uncle,” and “I plead the the fifth”. Best to remember, however: Mercy derives from the Middle Ages term for “price paid” and assumes that dues indeed get paid and mean you get something in return from said authority;  crying Uncle has roots in an early 20th century joke; and pleading the fifth relies on a system of justice that is not only blind but is definitely not dressed in a flack jacket. All that not withstanding, the biggest inadequacy of preceding idioms is that they they roll off the tongue with a distinct lack bristle and grit. So this week member, “Fuckin A” should be your mettle reacto-exclamatory weigh-in of choice. After all, the term “profane” etymologically comes from “that which is before or outside the temple” and Fuckin A’s fortitude is a fine reminder that institutions aren’t the only place where moral compasses can be found.

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