Today, you are a member of… H A T S ! ! !

Ode out this week members to those almighty High Analog Transom Systems, those great irreplaceable mobile shelters keeping safe your swirling thought bucket from all inhospitable elements. Glory in head fashion of every ilk for the next seven by skull stylin’ in a Holmesian deerstalker, fantastic fez, butch montera, pointy capotain, smurfy phrygian, buster pork pie, or everyday tuque. Whether top, slouch, cloche, cowboy, panama, pith, trucker, or santa, a hat a day will keep the janusfaced blues away. And while you strut around town in haberdashed and millinery magnificence, doff one to the duke of hat multiplicity, Andy Kaufman, who would have been 62 this week had his laughbags not given out. And just as Andy was fucking funny without ever resorting to jokes, you members, with the right hattitude, can have crowned triumph without being beset by boring old monarchy.

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