Today, you are a member of… The Magnetosphere

Not all planets boast magnetic fields, Members. Mars, with its slow rotation and small core, doesn’t have the ferro-magnetism that the Earth’s core-for eons and day spin affords. Venus’ central state, a liquidy, room temperature thing doesn’t have the gumption of Jupiter’s, which grants the almost-sun a mini-universe-sized magnetic field that contains smaller ones just to see the borealis. Luckily, this week, you have more in common with the blue dots and red giants rather than the planets from whence men and women supposedly originate. Ergo: activate your poles, polish up your nickel-iron self and tell the solar winds to get the hell out of the way.

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